So, the other day, my husband and I had one of our typical little spats. We rarely ever fight, but we occasionally get tense at each other when one party begins to feel resentful over something like division of labor and the perception that the other one isn't pulling his or her own weight.
When you've been married for ten years, there are many things that can begin to irritate.
The day after that, I talked to a friend who confided in me that she and her husband were getting a divorce. She discovered that he had put up an ad stating that he was single and looking.
She is such a wonderful woman. This behavior seems so inexplicable and inexcusable. It really put the whole "you're not picking up enough around the house" tension into perspective.
When I got home, I gave Tad a big hug and let him know how much I appreciated him. Minor irritations aside, he is a really wonderful man.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Monday, June 23, 2008
Give Me Sexy
On Saturday, we went to two very different birthday parties.
Since having the kids, our social life got automatically curtailed a bit, by default, so it was unusual for us to be double-booked. Normally, I would simply have picked one thing and ignored the other, but both were quite important.
One was for my Uncle Charlie's 80th birthday party. The second was for my friend Jen's 40th birthday party. The two were in deep contrast.
My uncle's was at a Chinese restaurant (actually, it was a joint celebration for him and my Aunt Susan). I had thought that it would be a simple family affair with us having maybe three tables or so to accomodate the extended family, but they had booked the entire restaurant. There were probably 150 people there.
It was a full on Chinese banquet. If you've ever attended one of those, you will know that there is no shortage of food. We had, among other things: fish maw soup, peking duck, crispy chicken, whole sea bass, seafood stir fry in a crispy taro root bowl, long life noodles and several other dishes, to make up eight courses (plus soup, not to mention the sew bao (little peach-shaped bean paste buns traditional at birthdays).
They went all out for this celebration. At each table were goody bags for the guests with chopsticks, bowls and candy to take home. Balloons festooned the tables. They even had karaoke (I've never seen karaoke at a chinese function, ever).
Now, one thing about the chinese is that we (they) place a lot of value on things like color (red and pink are lucky colors and will always figure prominently at traditional weddings) and numbers (my mom had advised me to donate $30 to the institutions of my aunt and uncle's choice and I, not knowing the significance of this obeyed. All I know is that to give four of anything is very bad form, as four ("see") has the same sound as death in Chinese).
I'm pretty sure that it's because of the desire for lucky colors that our goody bags were pink Victoria's Secret bags. They were lovely bags, to be sure, but the slogan ("Give me sexy") was not something that I tend to think of when I think of my Uncle Charlie....
The balloons were also pleasingly inappropriate: Happy Birthday Barbie balloons.
I mean, "Give me sexy" notwithstanding, I can almost understand the Victoria's Secret bags (they're sturdy, glossy and perhaps some family member got a stack for cheap), but the Barbie balloons, with the big color image of Barbie on them were a little more inexplicable...
After hearing some somewhat painful karaoke (well, the important thing is to have fun, though, and I certainly could not do better, so I should just shut up), both in English and Chinese, and having some of the very beautiful cake (two giant sheet cakes with decorative dragon and phoenix, representing the husband and the wife), we departed to deposit the children at home with a babysitter and to go to my friend Jen's 40th birthday.
Two big milestone birthdays, but very different occasions.
John and Jen pioneered the Poetry Slam home party. They had the first one perhaps 10 or more years ago. The rules are that each guest must bring a poem, written piece, song or other material and read or perform it in front of the others. Guests are, by necessity, fortified with a certain amount of liquid courage before the curtain rises. Over the years, people have performed many wonderful, amazing and creative pieces, some better than others, but all, no matter what, received with great encouragement. They're always fun.
This one, as it was for Jen's 40th birthday (FORTY, I tell you! We're all getting OLD!!!!), had a slightly different crowd, but all still very fun, wonderful people. One man that I didn't know, that must have been a work person, shouted funny things from the back and reminded me of no one other than a prominent exec I know and admire. In very non-exec style, he and some friends did a very hilarious take on the old SNL Sprockets skit ("Touch her monkey!")
We had a great time, it was wonderful to see people that we haven't seen in a long time.
One of the great people that I always look forward to seeing at these types of events is our friend, Terri. Terri had some sort of stomach-stapling type surgery for weight loss last year and SHE LOOKED WONDERFUL. Her piece was about how her life was beginning to open up, that she was dating (and loving it) and how exhilarating this all was for her. She gave me a link to her blog and later I read, with great fascination, about the incredible shrinking girl. Check it out, she's funny and honest and it's a really good read...
My own piece focused on the birthday girl, but I have to tell you that it's sometimes not so easy to find rhymes for "Muir" (pure? cure? manure?)
Since having the kids, our social life got automatically curtailed a bit, by default, so it was unusual for us to be double-booked. Normally, I would simply have picked one thing and ignored the other, but both were quite important.
One was for my Uncle Charlie's 80th birthday party. The second was for my friend Jen's 40th birthday party. The two were in deep contrast.
My uncle's was at a Chinese restaurant (actually, it was a joint celebration for him and my Aunt Susan). I had thought that it would be a simple family affair with us having maybe three tables or so to accomodate the extended family, but they had booked the entire restaurant. There were probably 150 people there.
It was a full on Chinese banquet. If you've ever attended one of those, you will know that there is no shortage of food. We had, among other things: fish maw soup, peking duck, crispy chicken, whole sea bass, seafood stir fry in a crispy taro root bowl, long life noodles and several other dishes, to make up eight courses (plus soup, not to mention the sew bao (little peach-shaped bean paste buns traditional at birthdays).
They went all out for this celebration. At each table were goody bags for the guests with chopsticks, bowls and candy to take home. Balloons festooned the tables. They even had karaoke (I've never seen karaoke at a chinese function, ever).
Now, one thing about the chinese is that we (they) place a lot of value on things like color (red and pink are lucky colors and will always figure prominently at traditional weddings) and numbers (my mom had advised me to donate $30 to the institutions of my aunt and uncle's choice and I, not knowing the significance of this obeyed. All I know is that to give four of anything is very bad form, as four ("see") has the same sound as death in Chinese).
I'm pretty sure that it's because of the desire for lucky colors that our goody bags were pink Victoria's Secret bags. They were lovely bags, to be sure, but the slogan ("Give me sexy") was not something that I tend to think of when I think of my Uncle Charlie....
The balloons were also pleasingly inappropriate: Happy Birthday Barbie balloons.I mean, "Give me sexy" notwithstanding, I can almost understand the Victoria's Secret bags (they're sturdy, glossy and perhaps some family member got a stack for cheap), but the Barbie balloons, with the big color image of Barbie on them were a little more inexplicable...
After hearing some somewhat painful karaoke (well, the important thing is to have fun, though, and I certainly could not do better, so I should just shut up), both in English and Chinese, and having some of the very beautiful cake (two giant sheet cakes with decorative dragon and phoenix, representing the husband and the wife), we departed to deposit the children at home with a babysitter and to go to my friend Jen's 40th birthday.
Two big milestone birthdays, but very different occasions.
John and Jen pioneered the Poetry Slam home party. They had the first one perhaps 10 or more years ago. The rules are that each guest must bring a poem, written piece, song or other material and read or perform it in front of the others. Guests are, by necessity, fortified with a certain amount of liquid courage before the curtain rises. Over the years, people have performed many wonderful, amazing and creative pieces, some better than others, but all, no matter what, received with great encouragement. They're always fun.
This one, as it was for Jen's 40th birthday (FORTY, I tell you! We're all getting OLD!!!!), had a slightly different crowd, but all still very fun, wonderful people. One man that I didn't know, that must have been a work person, shouted funny things from the back and reminded me of no one other than a prominent exec I know and admire. In very non-exec style, he and some friends did a very hilarious take on the old SNL Sprockets skit ("Touch her monkey!")
We had a great time, it was wonderful to see people that we haven't seen in a long time.
One of the great people that I always look forward to seeing at these types of events is our friend, Terri. Terri had some sort of stomach-stapling type surgery for weight loss last year and SHE LOOKED WONDERFUL. Her piece was about how her life was beginning to open up, that she was dating (and loving it) and how exhilarating this all was for her. She gave me a link to her blog and later I read, with great fascination, about the incredible shrinking girl. Check it out, she's funny and honest and it's a really good read...
My own piece focused on the birthday girl, but I have to tell you that it's sometimes not so easy to find rhymes for "Muir" (pure? cure? manure?)
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Last Day of School!
A thrilling day for the boys: "No more homework, no more books. No more teacher's dirty looks!"
Off for the entire summer with nary a structured activity in sight.
I looked through some of the work that they brought home. I found this essay in Ethan's pile of papers:
Yes, I know, tons of mistakes, but I'm still so proud....
Below a photo of the first frog, named Sweetie Pie.
Here is a journal entry from Colin along the same theme:
Off for the entire summer with nary a structured activity in sight.
I looked through some of the work that they brought home. I found this essay in Ethan's pile of papers:
Wuns I went too monotana. I canot remembr haw old I was. There was a rir and ther was a briige ovr it. The watre wusnt very swift and it has a litl sand. Then mom sau a frog and we cot it. We spent the hol day with it then we went to dinr. The necst day we went to the othr sid of the rifr. We cot a fatr frog. Then the thrd tim we went ther we did not cech a frog.
Yes, I know, tons of mistakes, but I'm still so proud....
Below a photo of the first frog, named Sweetie Pie.
Here is a journal entry from Colin along the same theme:
10 Best things About Summer
- Camping
- Sun
- Swiming
- no home worck
- fishing
- redeing
Apparently, he couldn't think of anything pleasurable after "redeing."
Saturday, June 7, 2008
Spider Cake!
My coworker, Maria (henceforth to be called "Auntie Maria") is, in her non-corporate life known as The Cake Lady.
She was kind enough to make a birthday cake for the boys, check out how adorable her spider cake creation is!
The boys were delighted and it was truly delicious....
Her creations are truly spectacular. This summer, she has been commissioned to do a wedding cake in the shape of the Starship Enterprise. I am SO looking forward to seeing that one!
I'll post a link to her website as soon as I can!
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
May the Force be with you
Ideally, of course, children should be used as accessories to perfect their mother's best costumes.
Thirty some years after their mom was initially afflicted with a Star Wars mania that lasts to this very day, the boys were hit with the bug as well, resulting in easy store-bought Halloween costumes.
Happily, I was able to scrounge up my Princess Leia costume from the bottom of my costume box and -- voila! -- my very own Star Wars trilogy!
Thirty some years after their mom was initially afflicted with a Star Wars mania that lasts to this very day, the boys were hit with the bug as well, resulting in easy store-bought Halloween costumes.
Happily, I was able to scrounge up my Princess Leia costume from the bottom of my costume box and -- voila! -- my very own Star Wars trilogy!
The pix were taken at a New Year's party, when the boys reprised their popular roles as clone troopers.
Sunday, June 1, 2008
Best circus party ever
ll, in retrospect, the theme really should have been a carnival party, rather than a circus party, as any elephants, tigers, trapeze artists and other big-top attractions were sorely lacking, however, the carnie atmosphere permeated everthing.
Guests were greeted at the door and given a paper bracelet that read "Admit one • All games" on it. Tad's parents then offered them a balloon animal (they had practiced creating hats, swords and a basic animal shape -- they were quite good), then they were shown into the back yard to begin the fun.
(bracelet as shown on young party guest's wrist as she plays the duck lasso game)
I showed them their goodie bags, each marked with their names. I told them that this party was not one where they would simply be given goodie bags at the end, but that they would have to earn their prizes. As they did, they had a ready spot to stash their loot.
We had five games that the kids played to earn tickets with which to "purchase" prizes:
I was very gratified to see how quickly the kids dived into the games and really got into the spirit of things. Of course, the big reason why they got jazzed so quickly over the games was that the tickets they earned could be redeemed for candy and toys at the concession stand, below.
My husband, Tad, manned the concession stand. You can see him spinning the cotton candy above (note: cotton candy does not keep well if you spin it and let it sit -- it attracts moisture and dissolves! You can save it in ziplock baggies, if you need to). Over the last few weeks, I picked up little things I thought kids would be interested in wherever I could find them cheap. Century Novelty was a good find. I got foam glider kits, body glitter, squirt guns, clown noses and other little things from them. At other spots, I picked up lip gloss, puzzle sets and a bunch of assorted candy. Some sparkley headbands with mylar flowers and technicolor feathers were a huge hit with the girls. Tad found some great party favors at Target and brought home wooden snakes and whoopie cushions. I sorted things into various baskets and marked them with tags that let the guests know how many tickets would be needed to redeem each item. Small pieces of candy were worth one ticket. The foam gliders and lip gloss were relatively luxurious and worth five tickets each.
Once kids got the idea, they dove into each game enthusiastically, quickly filling up their goodie bags (below).
A lot of the fun of the games goes to my enthusiastic "carnies," who are known, in their other lives, as the kids' grandma, grandpa, Uncle Johnny and godmother Sarah. They were great and kept the kids going from one fun activity to another.
Guests were greeted at the door and given a paper bracelet that read "Admit one • All games" on it. Tad's parents then offered them a balloon animal (they had practiced creating hats, swords and a basic animal shape -- they were quite good), then they were shown into the back yard to begin the fun.
(bracelet as shown on young party guest's wrist as she plays the duck lasso game)
I showed them their goodie bags, each marked with their names. I told them that this party was not one where they would simply be given goodie bags at the end, but that they would have to earn their prizes. As they did, they had a ready spot to stash their loot.
We had five games that the kids played to earn tickets with which to "purchase" prizes:
- Ring Toss (shown below), a lawn game that I picked up at Freddie's for 40% off. They got four tries and were given that many tickets.
- Duck Lasso, with floating ducks that kids tried to lasso out of a galvanized metal tub. When they got a duck, they turned that duck over to find a number (1 to 3) and were given that number of tickets.
- Clown Dunk. I hung a laminated clown face in a tipped over wastebasket and invited kids to try to bean him with a collection of water balloons that I'd spent party of the morning filling up.
- Go Fish. This was a magnetic fishing game I got for the boys at Target many years ago and which they never really played with much. My carnie counted to 30 while the children tried to get as many of the fish as they could.
- Bottle Splash. Party goers tried to knock over number of plastic drink bottles with super soakers.
I was very gratified to see how quickly the kids dived into the games and really got into the spirit of things. Of course, the big reason why they got jazzed so quickly over the games was that the tickets they earned could be redeemed for candy and toys at the concession stand, below.
My husband, Tad, manned the concession stand. You can see him spinning the cotton candy above (note: cotton candy does not keep well if you spin it and let it sit -- it attracts moisture and dissolves! You can save it in ziplock baggies, if you need to). Over the last few weeks, I picked up little things I thought kids would be interested in wherever I could find them cheap. Century Novelty was a good find. I got foam glider kits, body glitter, squirt guns, clown noses and other little things from them. At other spots, I picked up lip gloss, puzzle sets and a bunch of assorted candy. Some sparkley headbands with mylar flowers and technicolor feathers were a huge hit with the girls. Tad found some great party favors at Target and brought home wooden snakes and whoopie cushions. I sorted things into various baskets and marked them with tags that let the guests know how many tickets would be needed to redeem each item. Small pieces of candy were worth one ticket. The foam gliders and lip gloss were relatively luxurious and worth five tickets each.
Once kids got the idea, they dove into each game enthusiastically, quickly filling up their goodie bags (below).
A lot of the fun of the games goes to my enthusiastic "carnies," who are known, in their other lives, as the kids' grandma, grandpa, Uncle Johnny and godmother Sarah. They were great and kept the kids going from one fun activity to another.
My boys, above, are looking over the concession stand. Later in the party, the kids would virtually wipe it out (which was good -- I didn't need the sugary leftovers in the house afterward!).
I polled several of the kids after the party and even the most jaded of them pronounced the party a great success!
Thank goodness it's over for another year, though. And what a relief! I love the backyard birthday party (last year the boys had voted for a bowling party, which was not nearly as much fun for me to plan) and am soooo glad that this one was so successful!
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